u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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