Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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