Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
