I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
