somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
where are you?
Hypothermia
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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