I love black thongs
no you cant smoke seaweed
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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