He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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