we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize