ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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