Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
