i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I enjoy the company of your penis
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