So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
