no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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