No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
He shit in the fireplace
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
