WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
