; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize