yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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