What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
