when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize