If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Randomize
