I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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