so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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