Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
