That's intense
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
We don't watch enough power rangers
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
