so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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