You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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