There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize