I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
