bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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