but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
