nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
