cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
