I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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