i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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