You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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