He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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