Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
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