and you said cock pushups were impossible
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
