eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
