He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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