She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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