what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
