and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize
