So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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