We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
