the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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