You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
