I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
