Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
