I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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