If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
